Andrew:  When there is lighting, does that mean that God is mad?

After a little bit of discussion, the boys began to discuss other weather patterns and tried to relate them to God.

Ben:  If it is raining, God is crying . . . or maybe spilling water.

Andrew: . . . . or peeing?!?

After a quick chuckle, we explained . . . No, definitely not peeing.  By then it was too late . . . let the bodily functions begin . . .

Andrew:  Thunder means he’s burping . . .

Ben:  . . . or farting.

Ok, so our boys have learned bathroom humor . . . God, please forgive them.

Dad:  *looking down at the spaghetti spot on his shirt*

Mom:  Nice

Ben:  Mom, I know you told me not to watch too much TV but can I tell you something.

Mom:  What’s that Ben?

Ben:  Oxi Clean removes stains fast . . . that’s what it said on TV.

Ok, maybe they are watching too much TV.  You don’t realize how much kids soak in until they start reciting tag lines from commercials to you.  Another related story was when we were on vacation, we were trying to think of something for lunch . . .

Mom:  Hey boys, how about Subway?

Ben and Andrew:  *at the same time*  EAT FRESH!

Ok, time to cut down on TV time.

The party was at a local hotel with a swimming pool and water slide.  I drove Benjamin to the party where he was one of 3 boys to attend.  Scheduled for 3 hours, I hung out for a bit before sneaking out to let Ben have some fun on his own without the pressure of Dad constantly keeping an eye on him.  Ben also seemed pretty reserved with me being there.

After coming back to pick up Ben, the party was running late so when I got to the room, they were just starting with the cake.  Other parents started to show up but had to patiently wait as the kids were waiting for the Birthday Girl to open presents.  The kids started to gather around the Birthday Girl and Ben gave me a look . . . I told him to join his friends.

After a few presents were opened, Ben suddenly popped up in middle of the kids . . . with the commotion of kids gawking at the presents, he loudly said:

Ben:  Dad . . . . are you doing okay?

Dad:  Yeah Ben, I’m fine.

Ben:  Okay.  **Sitting back down**

As he sat down, another parent standing next to me looked back and asked . . . “Was he checking on you?”  I had to simply nod my head yes.  Here I was worried about him . . . turns out . . . I think he was more worried about me at the party

Dad:  Ben, does daddy’s haircut look good?

Ben:  If I said no, would you feel bad?

Dad:  Why does it look bad?

Ben:  Oh, no dad . . . you look handsome.

I think I’m being paranoid now because I sensed some sarcasm in that last statement

Ben:  Leslie, the FBI stopped by at our house!

Leslie:  Why did the FBI Stop by your house?

Ben:  Because dad wanted to order pizzas!

Okay, probably need to explain this one a little more.  Ben sometimes likes to dramatize his stories but this is a truthful story . . . kind of.

It was a cold, snowing evening at the Davis household when there was a loud knocking at the door.  The dogs aren’t used to visitors so they began to bark.  Ben, Andrew, and Jacob took a break from playing Star Wars Lego on the Wii to see who was stopping by.

Dad answered the door and invited the stranger in.  The stranger handed dad some paper work and as Dad was filling it out, the boys came in for a closer examination of the guest.  Looking at his hat, they asked:

Ben:  Are you the FBI?

Stranger:  *in a stern voice*  Why, yes I am.

Jacob:  I knew it, that’s what it says on your hat . . . FBI.

Andrew:  What are you doing here?

Stranger:  I arrest boys that are being bad, are you boys being bad?

BOYS:  NOOOOO!!!!

.

.

After the paper work was done . . .

Ben:  Dad, what were you doing with the FBI?

Dad:  Ordering pizzas.  (Of, course)

Okay, in actuality it was a boy from the Rochester Youth Hockey League that had an FBI hat.  He was going door to door in our neighborhood selling pizzas for fund-raising.  Several weeks later when he dropped off the pizzas, the boys recognized him and called him the “FBI guy”.  He was  a very friendly kid and was kind enough to entertain the boys and play along with the FBI story.

Hmm . . . I’m suddenly hungry for pizza . . . go figure.

As we are driving,  an excited voice from the back seat . . .

Ben:  “Dad, what does that say?”

Dad:  “Stewartville Auto Sales”

Ben:  “No the other sign.  It says something .com”

Dad:  “Oh, www.findcars.com”

Ben:  “We can probably go to that on the computer.”

He also realizes that if he sticks a .com at the end of something he likes, they might have some cool stuff:

• lego.com
• starwars.com
• pbskids.com

“Dad, can I borrow your computer?”

This has also sparked his imagination of the possibilities.

Ben:  “Dad, I just though of something . . . snowshop.com”

Dad:  “What is that Ben?”

Ben:  “I don’t know, I just made it up.  It sounds cool though.”

snowshop.com is already taken . . . I checked.  If he comes up with something unique and available, maybe Dad will buy the domain for him as a present   Now that’s geeky!

Andrew is a big fan of using the big boy urinals (even if it means tip toeing to reach it as dad nervously watches on).  Even though he thinks of himself as a big boy for standing up, he gives everyone a reminder of how young he is by dropping his pants and drawers all the way down to his ankles, as all kids his age do.

While at the mall, Andrew gave dad that look of panic, so without exchanging words, we were headed toward the bathroom.  Ben didn’t need to go, so as we entered the bathroom, Ben found a place to sit near Andrew as he patiently waited.  At the time we were the only ones in the bathroom and dad was suffering though the normal “yeah you did, no I didn’t, yeah you did,  . . . ” conversations.  Suddenly, someone came walking in and the conversation stopped.  Andrew was still going at the urinal, and as the person walked past, Ben took both of his hands and made a mini wall to cover-up Andrew’s bottom from the person passing by.  Although no words were said, Ben’s eyes gave him the look of “Nothing to see here, keep it moving!”

Ben definitely takes on the responsibility to protect his brother.  Dad shared the story with Mom for a good chuckle.

Here is an example . . .

Mornings are very hectic in the Davis household.  Mom and Dad do our best to get the boys up and going, setting out their clothes, feeding the dogs, getting ready for work, etc . . .

As we are in middle of our routine, Mom walked in on Ben and Andrew . . . picture if you will Ben squatting in the middle of the floor with his pajama shirt over his knees . . . Andrew with bundled socks trying to stuff it under Ben’s pajama shirt . . . Mom walking in the middle of this process:

Mom:   What are you guys doing?

*Ben and Andrew looking up innocently*

Andrew:   Ben’s laying eggs.

Mom:  Okay then [walking away shaking her head]

. . . Never a dull moment.

No Facebook, No Twitter, No Problem . . . email your NADM stories for a future posting (nadm@jeffnjudy.com)

Judy and I would have been happy to get one or two runs from Andrew.  To our surprise and enjoyment, both boys lasted the full 3 hours.  We took one of the cameras to take pictures and we were able to take a little bit of video too.

The boys really enjoy “Fireflies” by Owl City (BTW, a Minnesota group out of Owatonna) so I put together a video of snow tubing to that song:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=LknBsiNNucs

Ben:  Oh Dad, I got a phone number.

Dad:  What?

Ben: A girl at school gave me her phone number so I gave her mine.

Ben reached into his pocket and pulled out a crumpled piece of paper and handed it to Dad.  Opening up the paper, in green highlighter was some numbers.  Very cute . . . instead of 507 it read 705.  There were other 7′s and all the sevens were written backwards.  A few dashes and a total of about 12 digits.  (I might try to post a picture of the written number)

This was too cute.

Dad: *smiling* Ben . . . go show your mom.